A Sunshiny Day!

I am sitting in front of the computer getting ready to have a panic attack over this essay "Why Do I Want to Live and Work in Japan."
I made an outline earlier and I have the points I want to make, but when I try to start it off it doesn't feel right. I guess there isn't any hurry really...but I need to get this done before the New Year.

Oh yeah..I am totally addicted to Frog Style Mini Toys



O'k..I'm going to see if I can get my head together...

Cold Feet?

I certainly hope not!
But I fear i do have them.
I have my passport and now, as I start writing my reason for wanting to go I am getting nervous.
My biggest fear is that my reasons are not good enough.
That I am not good enough.
And then what if I am hired, they make you pay your own airfare...how will I afford a plane trip.
I don't make a lot of money as it is.
Most of what I do make goes right to bills...
I can't ask my family as they have done so much for me already. Plus why would they pay me to leave when they would want me to stay?

I must say, I am not a very religious person but I am rather spiritual.
Whatever I have prayed for and prayed for guidance on has always turned out well.
So, tonight I will pray for miracles and direction and strength.
I have set in my heart that I will do this.
I see my destination, my goal...the path is laid out before me like a puzzle.

I am still waiting for my other Japanese learning materials.
I also have a dharma on the way..very exciting.

My dream is more real today.

Today, I received my new passport.
I just mailed it out two and half weeks ago and already it is back.
Now I can begin applying for positions!!
I'm so excited!

I'm still working on my reasons for going, my motivation....
My new keyboard and mousepad as well as my lessons book have not arrived yet.
Maybe tomorrow...

And now for the essay

While I wait for my passport to arrive, I have decided to get started on my essay. Many of these ESL employers want an essay explaining why you want to go teach in Japan. Is it wrong that my reasons are totally personal. I don't have any super lofty goals. But I have to be able to word my reasons in way that is compelling. I hope the rest of my educational items arrive today. That reminds me...I am unsure what to do about professional references.
Sure, I have them but I don't know how the people I would turn to for references would feel about writing a letter of recommendation. I cannot use my current employer mainly because I have not official come out and said "Hey, I'm trying to get job teaching in Japan!!" Not only that, but it would be rude and unprofessional...therefore I will blog about it instead.

So back to the essay, I am compiling talking points to be further fleshed out in the coming weeks. Oh, and I thought my plan was unknown but my sister has been telling people it is only a matter of time before I go to Japan. She said to a friend, while I was standing there, "yeah, I just know we are going to wake up one day and she [me] will tell us,' I'm going to Japan and my flight leaves tomorrow...so bye!'" I won't be that abrupt, but I won't tell them anything officially until all the details are worked out.

One deadline has passed...

I keep getting cold feet about this whole "live in Japan for a year" thing. But then I read my horoscope the other day. I don't remember it exactly, but it pretty much said that I need to stick with my plans and that good things will come, but those closest to you won't understand. And they won't. My family will have a fit. The biggest fit ever!! It will be of biblical proportions. No doubt they will throw in my face my Dad's age (even though he is pretty healthy) or go one about how much they depend on me (and they do...they really do). But it isn't healthy. I'm not a teenager anymore. I have to step out and do something, not spinning my wheels while being on call for my family. I hate being the eldest child.

Right now, I am looking into my options for teaching English in Japan.
I have already missed the deadline for a program I wanted to apply to, so that option is out.
There are others options that I am looking into. I sent out my paperwork to get my passport renewed about a week and a half ago.

Hopefully the renewal process will not be as long as the original application process (but that department is seriously understaffed...I should have gotten my passport renewed over the summer...oh well). It will happen, I just gotta go with flow. I can't control everything.

And yes, I am attempting to learn the language.
It doesn't hurt anymore. I can understand a little...like recognize words. My home brew immersion process is a trip. I watch NHK television and Japanese TV shows. I listen to Japanese music (hey, that process helped me to understand Spanish better). Of course you need text books and conversation tapes. I converted my tapes to Mp3 form so I could listen to them on my player at night. Here are some of the books I have to help me learn.


I have a few more books on the way.
I'll post pictures of those too. In addition to books, audio, and tv programs, I also have a CD Rom program...yeah I am very serious about this.